Funny Christmas Poems

Sharing funny Christmas poems and humorous Christmas poems is a good way to set the atmosphere of any Christmas gathering or party. Use our collected short Christmas poem or best Christmas poem for writing in the Christmas card. Kids Christmas poems and children Christmas poems are especially collected for kids. Here are also acrostic Christmas poems for kids and Christmas poems for boyfriend.

Funny christmas poems

  1. The funniest face
    looked out at me
    From a silver ball
    On the Christmas Tree!

    At first I thought
    It was Santa’s elf,
    But I looked again and
    It was just myself!

  2. All I want for Christmas is some Prada.
    Not an imitation, just some Prada.
    I told mum that nothing else would do.
    There’s loads of designs, so she can have some too.
    I don’t care which ever gifts she gets me.
    Handbags, Shoes, clothes, they’re all the same.
    I can’t wait for Christmas day to come
    ‘Cause all I want for Christmas is some Prada.
  3. Most people love to eat,
    That’s everyone’s weakness
    Especially on holidays,
    There’s a lot of sweets,

    But after holiday,
    We face this figure problem
    Had bulky sides and huge belly
    So the main goal now is to be SEXY!

  4. They put me in the oven to bake.
    Me, a deprived and miserable cake.
    Feeling the heat, I started to bubble.
    Watching the others, I knew I was in trouble.

    They opened the door and I started my life.
    Frosting me with a silver knife,
    Decorating me with candy jewels.
    The rest of my batch looked like fools.

    Lifting me up, she took off my wrapper.
    Feeling the breeze, I wanted to slap her.
    Opening her mouth with shiny teeth inside,
    This was the day this cupcake died.

  5. Christmas Day is a time for fun,
    so come on over to our house hun!
    We’ll have plenty of drinks and food for all;
    we are sure to have a grand ball!
  6. Christmas is here!
    Let’s celebrate with cheer,
    I will coz I’m happy,
    I’ll get the gifts that make me merry.

    Oh my friends, be my Santa,
    Just like my Mama and Papa.
    Gifts and cash are so much welcome,
    That would surely bring me so much fun!

  7. Without Santa’s little helper
    Christmas would be very hard
    I don’t think I could do Christmas
    With out my credit card
  8. They used to be
    All red and green
    But now they’re
    White and blue.

    The Christmas lights
    Like so much else
    Have changed their
    Point of view.

    They’re not about
    The holiday.
    They’re all about
    The “season.”

    But red and green
    Or blue and white,
    Well, Christmas
    Is the reason!

    Merry Christmas!

  9. I made myself a snowball,
    As perfect as could be,
    I thought I’d keep it as a pet,
    And let it sleep with me.
    I made it some pajamas,
    And a pillow for its head,
    Then last night it ran away,
    But first – it wet the bed!
  10. There once was an elf named Fred
    Whose house was of gingerbread.
    Though tasty, these walls
    dissolved in snowfalls
    And also made crumbs in Fred’s bed.
  11. No one’s hangin’ stockings up,
    No one’s bakin’ pies;
    No one’s lookin’ up to see
    A new star in the sky.
    No one’s talkin’ brotherhood,
    No one’s givin’ gifts;
    And no one loves a Christmas tree
    On March the 25th.
  12. Old Scrooge wore a smile not a sneer
    And was filled with Holiday cheer.
    For there in the sky,
    He saw flying by
  13. There was an old fellow named Claus
    With a case of the mid-winter blahs.
    Taught his reindeer to fly
    So they took to the sky.
  14. Christmas may be cancelled
    The reindeer are on strike
    Santa’s stuck in Lapland
    Forget your brand new bike
  15. ‘Twas the night before Friday
    and all through the town,
    no cops were cruising,
    no narks were around.
  16. It’s the day before Christmas
    And all through the house
    The puppies are squeaking
    An old rubber mouse.
  17. T’was the night before Christmas, and all through the shop,
    The computers were whirring; they never do stop.
    The power was on and the temperature right,
    In hopes that the input would feed back that night.
  18. Christmas is great but,
    Everyone’s insane!
    Going crazy with this funny Christmas game
    Wrapping gifts and cooking food
    And no one has time or is not in the mood.
    Giving gifts to one another
    No one has time for my brother
    No attention for me at all
    I can’t even go to the mall!
    Christmas morning comes and what do I see
  19. I can feel it around me
    Its in the air
    Snow is now falling
    Twinkling lights everywhere
  20. I made myself a snowball,
    As perfect as could be,
    I thought I’d keep it as a pet,
    And let it sleep with me.
    I made it some pajamas,
    And a pillow for its head,
    Then last night it ran away,
    But first – it wet the bed!
  21. When christmas comes already yet,
    Mit presents large and sweet.
    The tings I like in mein stockings best,
  22. There was an old fellow named Claus
    With a case of the mid-winter blahs.
    Taught his reindeer to fly
    So they took to the sky.
    The taps on your roof may be paws.
  23. Gifts of time and love are surely the basic ingredients of a truly merry Christmas.
  24. Christmas is a time when kids tell Santa what they want and adults pay for it.  Deficits are when adults tell the government what they want and their kids pay for it
  25. Blessed is the season which engages the whole world in a conspiracy of love!
  26. Every time a hand reaches out
    To help another….that is Christmas
    Every time someone puts anger aside
    And strives for understanding
    That is Christmas
  27. Merry Christmas to friends!
    Merry Christmas to foes!
    The world’s bright with joy, so
    Forget all your woes.
    The earth’s full of beauty, of
    Love and good cheer.
    Merry Christmas to all and a
    Happy New Year!
  28. Nothing that might be construed to pollute.
    Nothing to aim, Nothing to shoot.
    Nothing that clamoured or made lots of noise.
    Nothing for just girls, or just for the boys.
    Nothing that claimed to be gender specific.
    Nothing that’s warlike or non-pacifistic.
  29. I want a hippopotamus for Christmas
    Only a hippopotamus will do
    No crocodiles, no rhinoceroses
    I only like hippopotamuses
    And hippopotamuses like me too
  30. I want a hippopotamus for Christmas
    Only a hippopotamus will do
    No crocodiles or rhinoceroseses
    I only like hippopotamuseses
    And hippopotamuses like me too!
  31. grass was covered with snow
    and it was Jesus’ birthday
    coming to his celebration
  32. Christmas is here
    We have nothing to fear
    We have some fun, Doing x-mas shopping
    Even waiting for Santa to fill our stockings
  33. I made myself a snowball,
    As perfect as could be,
    I thought I’d keep it as a pet,
    And let it sleep with me.I made it some pajamas,
    And a pillow for its head,
    Then last night it ran away,
    But first – it wet the bed!
  34. Can I take your picture;
    So Santa Claus knows
    exactly what to give me
    on this CHRISTMAS.
  35. You’re as big boned as
    Father Christmas Claus,
    your as stupid as a donkey,
    your as shit in bed as a camel,
    but your still the right person for me!